Post-It: ETD 00:02am

[maced_eggs]

[Sitting in someone else's cabin wearing someone else's stolen leather pants is Mason, playing with a stolen mess hall fork. Either he can't remember where he lives or he just straight up has difficulty caring]

So wait.



I'm a pris'ner.


But I don't have to work.

And I get free food and my own bed.

And no one's fuckin' yelling at me to pay rent. An' I'm basically on a cruise line with a spa and a pool and pretty girls.


Honestly, I'm struggling to find a downside. Isreally hard.

Comments

[codename_duchess]

Who gives a shit what you're wearing as long as they're not my magic getting-laid pants?

[maced_eggs]

But I really, really like these pants. An' I really like getting laid. Win-win, right?

How's about I give them back when I have sex?

[codename_duchess]

No! Don't get your sex smell on them!

[maced_eggs]

I did forget to mention this, but as I am not wearing any underwear, I am afraid my wank is rubbing up against your trousers already, mate.

Sorry.

[codename_duchess]

I am going to kill and/or murder you.

[maced_eggs]

Already dead. Can't kill me.

[codename_duchess]

Then I'll set a hypothesis, gather funding, and begin testing whether or not it can happen again.

And spoiler alert, it can!

[maced_eggs]

I think I know a little bit more about how death works than you do.

I'm not dying again. Not any time soon.

[codename_duchess]

Um, you're here. You're an inmate. You can die again.

[maced_eggs]

Yeah right. I beg to differ.

[codename_duchess]

You don't have powers, dumbass!

[maced_eggs]

I.



Am a motherfucking grim reaper.



I take souls for a living.


And if you don't shut the fuck up and let me keep these gorgeous leather pants, I will steal your soul and leave it in a toilet.


For all eternity.

[codename_duchess]

[Deep sigh. Deep, deeeeeeep sigh.]

I knew it was only a matter of time before we picked up a male Carol.

[maced_eggs]

I don't know who that is.


But if she also takes souls, I imagine we have much in common.

Also, is she single?

[codename_duchess]

She works at ISIS. I don't know if she takes souls, if she does she probably doesn't notice.

Yes. Though you look like you have delicate lady hands, so she'll never go for you.

[maced_eggs]

I do not have delicate lady hands. That's. Why would you say that? That's hurtful.

So she's not a reaper.

[codename_duchess]

Just sparing you the pain when she says it.

No. And if you are where's your big black hooded cloak?

[maced_eggs]

I don't. I've got nice big strong hands.

S'a bit hard to take souls when you're wandering around in a big black hooded coat. People see you, they don't want to get near you. Fuckin' duh, ev'ryone knows that.